| 10 | The Three Stooges are not available |
| 9 | Unlike Politicians, the VonClowns Promise and Deliver |
| 8 | Always Reliable, Professional, Flexible, Affordable and Highly Recommended |
| 7 | Their Show is Visually Exciting and Original. |
| 6 | They continually keep the Crowd Laughing. |
| 5 | Most of their Volunteers have survived the magic show. |
| 4 | DaMISSUS's Retirement Fund needs a big boost. |
| 3 | It is a FUN show for everyone, not just kids. |
| 2 | Oopsie and Bubbles hope to go to clown college. |
| 1 | Everybody loves clowns |